Self-Criticism & Shame
Individual therapy for people who find themselves caught in cycles of self-judgment, self-doubt, or the persistent feeling that they are somehow falling short
WHEN NOTHING FEELS LIKE ENOUGH
Many people who struggle with self-criticism appear capable, responsible, and successful from the outside. Others may see them as thoughtful, driven, or high-achieving. Yet internally, the experience can feel very different.
You may spend a great deal of time evaluating yourself, questioning your decisions, replaying mistakes, or focusing on what you should have done differently. No matter what you accomplish, it may never quite feel like enough. At times, it can seem as though you are living with an internal voice that is constantly monitoring, correcting, or demanding more.
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You may notice yourself:
questioning your decisions long after they are made
focusing more on mistakes than successes
feeling responsible for things that are not entirely yours to carry
comparing yourself to others and coming up short
struggling to accept praise or positive feedback
feeling disappointed in yourself even when you are doing your best
holding yourself to standards you would never expect from someone else
feeling like you should be further along than you are
Over time, these experiences can become exhausting and isolating.
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Self-criticism is rarely just self-criticism. Often it develops as an attempt to protect against something else. Disappointment. Failure. Rejection. Conflict. Not being enough.
For many people, the critical voice began as a way of staying safe, earning approval, avoiding mistakes, or maintaining connection. What once felt necessary may continue long after the original circumstances have changed. As a result, self-judgment can become so familiar that it feels like the truth rather than one way of relating to yourself.
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While self-criticism focuses on what you have done, shame often touches something deeper.
Instead of:
“I made a mistake.”
the experience becomes:
“There is something wrong with me.”
Shame can make it difficult to trust yourself, receive care from others, express needs, or feel fully at ease in relationships. It often thrives in secrecy and isolation. Many people carry it for years without recognizing how much influence it has on their lives.
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Therapy provides an opportunity to understand the origins of self-criticism rather than simply trying to silence it.
Together we may explore:
the standards you hold yourself to
where those standards came from
the emotional experiences beneath self-judgment
patterns of perfectionism, people-pleasing, or over-responsibility
the role shame may be playing in your relationships and sense of self
Rather than fighting parts of yourself, we work toward understanding them.
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As people develop a different relationship with self-criticism and shame, they often discover greater freedom in how they relate to themselves.
Over time there may be:
less harsh self-judgment
greater self-trust
increased emotional resilience
more realistic expectations of yourself
greater ability to receive support from others
a stronger sense of worth that is not dependent on performance or achievement
The goal is not to become someone who never struggles. The goal is to develop a relationship with yourself that is less driven by fear, criticism, and impossible standards.
THIS WORK MIGHT BE A GOOD FIT IF YOU
Feel like you’re never quite good enough
Hold yourself to standards you would never expect from someone else
Spend a lot of time questioning yourself
Feel weighed down by self-doubt or shame
Find it difficult to recognize your own strengths or accomplishments
WORKING WITH ME
I’m Rachel Floyd, a therapist based in Scottsdale. I value depth, curiosity, and being honest about what’s actually happening beneath the surface. I approach therapy thoughtfully, trusting that meaningful change emerges through awareness, understanding, and new experiences rather than pressure or quick fixes.
My goal is to offer a space where we can slow down enough to notice what is happening, make sense of longstanding patterns, and explore difficult experiences with care and curiosity.
GET STARTED
Reach out to schedule a free 15-minute consultation or book your first session.
Prefer to reach out directly?
Email me at rachel@figureandgroundtherapy.com
